We each have been given a life, which manifests through our body and mind. This life, this body-mind, is the one we have. You could say that this life, fully inhabiting this body, is our path. Of course we can work to improve the circumstances of our life and our experience of it, but we must start from where we are now, which means we need to accept our life just as it is now, not pretending it is other than it is, living in a fantasy land, or refusing to face things as they are. Even having a “spiritual” goal of becoming a wiser, more serene person at some future point can stop us from fully engaging in our life as it is now.
We have a tendency to take things personally. It’s understandable that so long as we think that we are a separate entity that ends with our skin we experience ourself as the centre of our universe: everything happens to me, my train was late, I was treated badly, I handled that really well, it shouldn’t have happened to me…
I’d like to suggest a way of looking at our life that I think helps us to take it all less personally. Because it isn’t personal. From moment to moment innumerable conditions are in operation that result in, for example, someone behaving towards you in a way that you find offensive or upsetting. Same thing if it starts to rain – innumerable conditions coming together – but we don’t usually take the weather personally, do we?
I suggest thinking of oneself as the caretaker of one’s life. A good caretaker will attend to whatever is in her care. If, for example, it is a house and garden she will keep it in good repair, get things fixed when they break, decorate, tend to the garden, without taking it personally when the boiler breaks down or the guttering needs replacing or the lawn needs mowing.
If we can regard ourself as the caretaker of our life I believe it will be easier to let go of resistance and engage more fully with this life of ours. Instead of fretting over perceived unfairness or looking for ways to avoid dealing with things we can simply get on and do what needs to be done. And as we open more completely to this life perhaps we will come to see that this me that is living it isn’t quite what we thought it was.